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25.8.08 14:00


August 24th, 2008

My mood today: undefinable.
My mood during the last days: something between melancholy and delight.
You don't have to understand. You don't even have to imagine.

Today, I saw HER. The mother of exile. The huge lady that opens the gates for a new, better world. Is this really a better world? It doesn't matter, the only interesting thing is that you believe in this tale. This is the clue for being happy: Only the belief in being happy.

The last day I had same kind of, let's call it depression. Wednesday didn't go according to plan so I was fed up with almost everything around me, and Melissa's agreement only amplified this feeling. So I was not in a position to do anything, especially studying and writing mails to my lovely friends (cancel the s). I even forget to call my mum for days, we only telephone once a week. I am a horrible daughter. I call it being adult.

Now, I am not in a bad temper. Although I have many reasons to be in!

(Btw: Something I discovered now - I am a better English blogger than a German one! I can express myself without using that much stupid keyboard faces. I am proud of myself.)

I could write a novel now, about my last days. But I'll do a summary, 'cause I have to write some mails and doing my homework. This is the first day since I have been here that I am not a summer school nerd. I am not proud of myself.

Wednesday: ###
4 - 6 p.m.: Much fun. Honey Melissa, the Polish guy and me getting dunked. Sharing the toilet together. Whole Starbucks was laughing. Thought we are doing a threesome, I bet. It was definitely fun.
6 p.m.: Actually, we wanted to see Batman in 3D. Supposed a lot of fun, drunken, of course. BUT. ###. Sold out. Argh. M***f***. Spanish guy stood me/us up. He was fucking a Spanish bitch. He made me hate him. We went to a concert. This was the beginning of my depression.

Thursday: Wall Street with Melissa. We started to gossip about America and NY. This was the first time, I wanted to go back "home". Quickly. Because I was totally pissed. We joined a tour and we couldn't see the Stock Exchange Market from inside. Whose fault? It's the terrorist one! Hate them.

Friday: Going out with Melissa and the Polish guy. Times Square. It was our last common evening. They are in their countries now, unfortunately. New York at night is gorgeous <3

Of course, we went shopping those three days, but it was a disaster, I am really too whatever to find something.

Saturday: East Village. Love it <3 <3 <3 Sam alone. Crazy guide. Crazy quarter. Crazy punk shops. BUT I DIDN'T BUT ANYTHING! Can you believe? Nothing! I tried dozen of trousers and shoes, but none fit well. I was so upset, that I didn't even take pictures.

Today: Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island.

I hate people talking shit about things they have no informations about. STOP IT!

Local time: Dinner time.
25.8.08 02:30


August 20th, 2008

This week is called "Melissa's and Sam' last common weak" or "Be crazy in New York". We wanna never forget our time in NY. The only sad fact is that we had merely 10 days together ^^

Monday: (it starts with something semicrazy) We bought Smoothies at Dunki'n Donuts, but we didn't drink them there, we went to a healthy fancy store/restaurant and relished it there.

Yesterday: OMG WTF BBQ! We went to the trashiest street on the world! 8th Street, St. Mark's Place. One Rock'n'Roll shop next to the other. I'll do a shopping tour there on Saturday. What we were really looking for was a tattoo and piercing saloon. We decided to do something really really really unforgettable. But... ID, please o.o Of course we aren't old enough. And we couldn't imagine that there are such serious about this! We missed school because of this, but finally we only found a piercing man who believed us being 18 and coming from Europe, so Melissa got her belly button piercing. I was holding her hand and it was very romantic, 'cause I tried to diverted her and talked about unusual stuff xD Although my dream wasn't realized, I was satisfied. And I was feeling good, because it was such a nice moment in life <3

Today's plan: Be curious! x)

20.8.08 14:47


August 19th, 2008


I saw Manhattan on a boat on night.
I bet it is one of the most breathtaking views I've ever saw.
I've never been an aimless person, but now I have definitely a goal to achieve. I've followed the wrong ideals, I've given the unimportant things in life a chance. I've been deterred of pain.
I'm not smarter now and I might not change my habits during one night, but I recognized what I've been known for such a long time:
Life is only valuable with an aim, for which you fight.
Otherwise, kill yourself. You don't have a reason to exist.
19.8.08 14:13



18.8.08 13:59


Sam and the Spanish guys - End of the story.

Today is the first day I will see him again after our common Friday night/evening. He calls it ONS, I call it TMS xD
He thinks now that he is a kifi o.O (in English you probably call it kifu) Jerk. He is 24. Would you call it kifu? I am weird, 'cause I call Patrick a kifi and he is 18 and his girlfirend 16, or something like that xD
We were talking English all the time. Very unusual for me. And I bet for him. 'Cause he was trying to speak Spanish and I was doing this face -> o.O
However, I hope he won't try to give me a kiss. There are only two person in this crazy school who are allowed to do such gesture, and he is neither of them.
I have to act normally. Okay, this is too noticeable. I have to be as strange as I am every day. 'Cause I am big girl now and big girls don't giggle and get red after such - call it whatever.

This is the end of the story "Sam and the Spanish guy(s)".

It's time for a new fairy (I changed the f-word) tale!
18.8.08 13:28


-.-

What a fucking summary of my last days!
It happened several interesting and funny things and I didn't tell you anything. Rofl.

Use your imagination xD
17.8.08 01:58


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